Hold On Tightly, Let Go Lightly
by Schmelly Inc
Summary: .::You never really know what you have until it's gone...or think it is, and in that absence you'll find the smallest things in the biggest places...you just have take the time to look::. Oneshot...fluff I suppose, AxelNaminé


Hey everyone! I just finished this story, I enjoyed writing it immensely :3 It kind of took me a while cause of my other story and I kept getting sidetracked by other ideas and whatnot but I managed to focus long enough to finish writing, typing, editing, and finally posting it. I really hope you enjoy it as much as I did writing it, that is my goal...to write a story that people will enjoy and that I enjoy as well...you should love what you write. Hope to hear from y'all, remember to read and review. Lol I hope this idea isn't totally cheesy...I categorized it as teen to be safe.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts and/or any of the characters, they belong to Square Enix and Disney.**

There are a couple thoughts in this one but it's only Axel...I'm just so used to writing his and I tend to forget about the others...but there isn't enough font enhancers anyways so it's all good. As usual thoughts are in _italics._

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**.::Hold On Tightly, Let Go Lightly::.**

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She sat silently by the rail of her balcony, tears gently falling to the cold metal that supported thin arms that cradled her rain soaked head. It had been a long time since she had seen him last…too long. But what could she do? She had never felt so alone…waiting and left to wonder if he'd ever come back. She ached for his touch, the tender sensation that had made her feel so real. She could barely remember it now, the way it reminded her of what it had been like, what it could be like.

She didn't want to forget…lose that beautiful feeling, no matter how much it hurt to never let it go. Never let him go…she just couldn't let herself.

The warmth he had brought to her cold life was fading faster with each passing day…the ticking of the clock ebbed away at her memory like a poison. She could barely breathe without him, suffocating without him in her life. She needed him more than he would ever know. She couldn't help but wonder if he felt it too…the painful ache that slowly corroded her essence when he wasn't around. Without him, she was nothing…he held a piece of her that desperately called out. It wanted to come home.

But the voice that silently called was beginning to die…she wanted to save it but she couldn't do it by herself.

Beautiful azure eyes lay hidden behind bangs that stuck to her skin, wet with the falling rain. Delicate features singing an endless song of sorrow. Tears left their glistening silhouettes on rain speckled eyelashes. She had never known she could cry this hard, when he had left…her world had fallen. Left in the ruins of something she had worked so hard on, she had discovered the inevitable cruelty that life always brought about. It had hurt so much…

Except this time he wasn't there to wipe away her tears…wrap her in his warm embrace and make everything okay.

Her lip quivered with pain as the rain continued to pound on her frail body. Eyes looked up in disappointment as a hand gently squeezed her shoulder…she really had to stop getting her hopes so high, they were only smashed to pieces when reality swung full circle with malice.

"You should get out of the rain, if you ever caught hypothermia waiting for him…he'd never forgive himself.

She tried to send the blue-eyed boy an appreciative smile but all she could manage was a weak grimace. She reluctantly rose from her lookout bench and moved slowly through the door the boy held open. Entering the shelter her room provided, she felt Roxas' eyes study her warily as she slumped dejectedly onto her awaiting bed.

"Don't worry Nami, he'll come back. He can take care of himself…"

Despite his words, reassurance was not what ran through her brain. Blue eyes were flecked with a worry for his friend that darkened his gaze and revealed the truth he tried to hide. Regardless, she sent the golden haired boy a small smile that she hoped was more convincing than his white lies.

Upon hearing the quiet click of her door, she pulled back the neatly folded covers that encased her mattress and climbed in under the welcoming sheets. Goosebumps were quick to rise across her rain soaked skin as the fresh, cold sheets wrapped around her damp body.

Eyelashes still moist with tears and rain, kissed her smooth cheeks as heavy eyelids succumbed to the burden of slumber. However, it was short-lived as sweat broke out across her body, feverish with nightmares that plagued her mind. Shaken from her fitful sleep, she struggled with the tangled sheets that clung to her clammy skin in restriction.

She was beginning to get used to this late night awakening…

Under half-lidded eyes, subtle dark circles blemished her porcelain complexion. Stained with the lack of sweet sedation that her body desperately needed, but couldn't seem to grasp. She couldn't even remember the last time she had actually been able to completely surrender herself to the night's call…she had eventually stopped keeping count.

Muscles loose with impeding exhaustion, she struggled to untangle herself from sweat soaked sheets that clung greedily to her skin. Bare feet hit the unwelcoming floor, sending shivers up her body as the glacial surface consumed the warmth that spread from her body with callous efficiency.

Once again without comforting warmth, she couldn't miss the familiar sensation that coursed through her body…almost like a calling, a desire. She easily discerned it as the hindering demand to be near him, to dull the constant ache that polluted her body. She needed to feel his presence, no matter how faint. She wouldn't ignore it this time…she couldn't afford to.

She timidly headed into the maze of hallways, following the trail of breadcrumbs that her intuition had placed. Invisible to the eye but evident to the soul. She felt the pinnacle leave a powerful impression before fading away and leaving her with little but a sliver of its previous energy. Her doe-like eyes stared at the door that she stood in front of. Even without having been in it or having seen it…she knew what it would hold, who it belonged to. But her hand still shook.

She knew he wouldn't be there, but she was overcome with apprehension because in a way…he would be.

She gently pushed on the door and watched as it gave way to her touch, before taking a few tentative steps inside and quietly closing the door behind her. The room was veiled in a penetrating darkness that smothered her vision. She stumbled through the dark in search of a light and headed towards the faint outline of a night table that graced her impaired sight.

Snagging her foot on an unseen lump on the floor, she was sent tumbling. Expecting the cold floor to brutally meet her cheek, she was surprised to feel the soft embrace of a mattress that luckily cushioned her fall.

Sending a mental thanks to the dormant mattress, she reached over to the bedside table in search of a lamp. Her slender fingers met the small tassel and she gently pulled, blinking as the soft light pushed the darkness to the far corners of the room.

Curious eyes fell upon one of his cloaks; thrown to the floor carelessly, the source of her near fall. She got up from the bed and moved forwards to gingerly gather the neglected cloak into her slender arms. Her eyes moistened as conflicting emotions rushed through her brain, letting a single tear stain the dark fabric as she held it close to her chest.

Thousands of memories ran through her head as she breathed in the comforting scent of his skin that lingered on the cloak…memories she had never given a second glance. Now she had to live with the regret, times she never appreciated until it was too late to. It was unbearably painful, but she wouldn't give it up for anything…it was all she had left.

She moved back to his bed and silently sat on the edge, folding the cloak tenderly, as slumber called with a temptation she couldn't deny. before placing it at the end of the bed. Her body sank willingly into the comfortable mattress, she didn't even bother to lift the covers. Her head lay heavily on a yielding pillow as she snuggled sleepily into the gentle fabric; comforted by his haunting scent that calmed the aching in her chest…she felt so close to him, despite how far away he really was.

Her fingertips unexpectedly met a familiar texture beneath his pillow as she adjusted her body to the contours of his mattress. She carefully pulled and a slightly crumpled piece of paper was drawn out from beneath. Faintly trembling hands gently smoothed out the mildly creased paper and a sad smile rose to her lips as her azure eyes fell on the page.

"Axel…why do you have to be such a big idiot," she whispered with a quiet laugh filled with contradicting sadness.

It was the first and only picture she had given him…it was of them, fingers tenderly intertwined, a simple gaze that meant more than a dozen roses could hope to bring with their meaningless blossoms. It had taken her so long to get him just right…she remembered every pencil stroke, the countless times she had dragged her eraser across mistakes because it wasn't as perfect as him. The colours blended to make them what they truly were…the deepest ebony, purest ivory, fiercest crimson, fairest indigo. But it was the emotion that held it together…that made it real.

It was what the drawing was about, finding the biggest things in the smallest places…the love in a simple gesture, their delicately intertwined fingers. The beautiful safety that love could bring in a world of crushing chaos. She couldn't believe he still had it…still treasured it.

Glistening eyes remained moist with tears that she refused to wipe, as she carefully replaced the picture to its place under his pillow. She let her beautiful eyes fall to the lure of slumber's undeniable invitation, she couldn't resist any longer.

She dreamt with a broken heart…and she knew that waking up would be the hardest part.

**.::.x.::.**

Rain poured down unforgiving on a man cloaked in midnight, as he trudged up the tedious steps that led to an imposing fortress of naught. He couldn't believe how long he had been gone…those damn heartless just wouldn't let up. Those little pissants were a real pain in the ass when they mobbed you in ridiculously massive hordes.

The man pushed back his hood as he shoved open the large door that led into the castle's entrance chamber, revealing a slightly damp mane of scarlet hair that, nonetheless, spiked at precarious angles. He let out a deep sigh of contentment…it felt so good to be back. There had been times he had almost given up but then he thought of her and just the memory had breathed life back into his dying hope.

He snuck a glance at the clock above the staircase…it was too late to see her, she'd probably slap him for waking her up in the dead of the night. He couldn't help grinning despite the fact, he'd be able to see her again…he had missed her so much. He never imagined that he could feel something so strong in his chest, a pleasantly burning emotion that flared beautifully whenever he was with her. Remembering that sensation was one of the only things that had kept him going.

The fiery man made his way up the impressive staircase and began his journey through seemingly endless halls, yearning for his soft mattress and a gentle place to finally lay his head. Upon reaching his room he noticed, with slight curiosity, the dull, soft light that peeked out from the very bottom of the door. He couldn't help but feel a hint of anger,

_Marluxia better not have used my room as 'party headquarters' like last time I was gone…I'll punch him so hard, flowers will shoot out his ass._

Eyes narrowed in preparation for the atrocity that his room would now be, he opened the doors slowly with a frown planted on his features. But as his viridian gaze fell on the scene before him, his face softened and he felt a warmth rise in his chest, gently driving away the anger.

He made his way quietly over to the sleeping girl, curled up innocently on top of his bed. He winced as the floor creaked loudly under his boot, and looked up quickly to see if he had waken her. He watched anxiously as she stirred slightly but relaxed his tense muscles as she pressed her beautiful face further into the soft pillow and continued to sleep. He glared angrily at the guilty floorboard before renewing his journey to the bed.

Upon reaching the edge of the bed, he crouched down onto his knees so his gaze was level with her angelic features.

_She looks so vulnerable when she's asleep…well more so than usual._

He hesitantly reached out a gloved hand before affectionately brushing the stray strands of hair that fell across her delicate face. His lips lifted into a small smirk as he watched the corners of her mouth curve into a cute smile, she was the light that shined in the darkness his heart had left behind…his light. His hand moved to her cheek, mind inwardly wondering if he should risk waking her, which he ignored as he tenderly stroked her creamy cheek. He withdrew his hand nervously as he saw her long eyelashes flutter and her body stir slightly.

_I should really start listening to my head, it has way more sense than I give it credit…_

He could only watch as her lashes trembled before exposing her beautiful, deep azure eyes that blinked slowly, still lingering within slumbers sweet embrace. Her eyes widened with disbelief, it couldn't possibly be him…could it? He saw her wide-eyed gaze and opened his mouth to explain himself,

"Okay, I know that it probably seems like I was watching you sleep…and I kind of was, but I didn't mean t-"

Axel was cut off as he felt her arms encircle his body, face pressed into his warm chest. She felt her eyes break into another onslaught of tears, but these ones were different…they were beautiful, tears of happiness. In return his arms wrapped closely around her slender body, lighting her soul back on fire with the touch she had almost forgotten. His flame ignited the smoldering embers of her heart, he wouldn't have to become a memory to her…she was in his arms once again.

"It thought you wouldn't come back…" she whispered into his cloak, damp with her tears.

He nestled his face in her silky hair, breathing in the soothing scent that was one of the beautiful things about her he had deeply missed, before lifting her chin gently and surrendering a soft, affectionate kiss on her forehead. He leant his own forehead against hers and felt her tilt into his touch, his voice quietly caressed her ears with his reassurance,

"If I know you'll be waiting…I'll always come back home."

She lowered her head and nuzzled reliantly into the crook of his neck, drifting gently into the arms of slumber, pacified by the contagious warmth his body offered. The fire tamer also felt the intense pull of sedations dulcet call; careful not to disturb the sleeping girl in his arms, he warily adjusted his arms under her knees and back before rising from his position on the floor and delicately placing her petite frame on his bed.

He stared down for a moment at her flawless beauty, caught breathless as the faint glow of the lamp followed the graceful silhouette of her features. He leant over drowsily and shut off the lamp, room plunged into darkness.

Carefully, he made his way over to the other side of the bed before gently sitting on the edge and kicking off his boots. Too tired to remove his cloak; he leant back into the yielding mattress in exhaustion and rolled over onto his side, shifting slightly closer to the faint outline of her body. Hearing her subtle rhythmic breathing eased his body and his breathing fell to the same measure as he slipped into sleep.

**.::.x.::.**

She was stirred into consciousness by a soft ray of light that left little spots of brilliance under her eyelids. Her mind, still drowsy with the remnants of sleep, almost forgot to register Axel's return but remembered as she attempted to rise from his bed. She was hindered by an arm draped around her waist that pulled her closer protectively as she tried to get up. The resistance died away instantly and she laid back down having woken up to find that everything was okay.

She really had begun to realize the little things that made life great…she wouldn't change it for the world. It was pure, it was beautiful.

She twisted around in his secure embrace to face his warm body and snuggle deeper into his chest, feeling his strong arms tighten around her slender body. He felt her mouth smile into his neck as she pressed her face into the familiar spot.

"What are you smiling about?" he mumbled sleepily into her hair.

She closed her eyes softly with the bliss she could only sum up with one beautiful word,

"Everything…"

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That's the gist of it guys! I hope you enjoyed it and I'd really like to know what you think...I really appreciate it and I think that getting input really helps a writer grow. Well whatever you decide I just hope you enjoy it and I enlightened your day...or something XD. My mind's a bit slow...it's really late, so I hope there aren't too many mistakes despite my best efforts...well cheerio! And remember to read and review!

Well until next time, cheers:)

Schmelly Inc.


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